all you need is love.

this is a very popular song by the very famous John lennon... well actually the Beatles. The reason the beatles is on my mind is because i am doing my research paper on John Lennon. but to be more exact I am doing it on was Yoko Ono the downfall of John Lennon, or the uprising of his music career. im actually getting a bit frustrated reading some of these music critics blogs. you see... im a huge beatles fan, and i can't stand yoko ono. i do not believe she ever loved john, but on the contrary she just wanted his fame and his money... John was famous...and he was her excerpt into the world of "fame and fortune" i believe she used him to get her voice out. i mean come on the plastic ono band... ONO BAND... DING DING DING DING... how much more evidence do you need? not to mention she just carried him around like a puppet half the time. i think thats why he "loved" her, because he didn't want to think for himself, and he liked that she would take control. Im a firm believer that his heart stayed with Cynthia Powell. i read her book and cried, and got so mad.. and yes i realize a book written by her could be somewhat biased, but a lot of the reports from his son Julianne, sort of line up with Cynthia's reports too. what really made me sad was when Julianne asked Cynthia one day, "why is it that on the TV dad talks about love all the time, but he doesn't love me" it broke my heart, and it gave me a huge perspective on john lennon. he was somewhat of a coward, and Yoko Ono took advantage of that.

anyways, a lot of these critics are making me so mad, because they think the new lennon was more real. even though he stayed in a hotel, not having any contact with his son, or the world for that matter... and just did drugs... even if he wouldn't have gotten shot, the drugs would have taken him eventually...
dont get me wrong, im a huge John Lennon fan, well, a Beatles fan. very huge Beatles Fan, but in my opinion, Yoko Ono was the worse thing to ever happen to him. period.

ON another note, Halloween weekend was SO AWESOME!!!! Matt and I were Prince... purple rain purple raaaiieeennn. and Apollonia; im a sex shooter, shooting love in your direction...
and we went to an adult party actually and it was A LOT of fun, we danced our tails off! haha, and we definitely won for the best costumes!
Saturday we went to the masquerade ball and I wore my prom dress, and my aunt painted a mask on me and made me look like a faerie. my hair looked really cool, and my other aunt painted a vine down my back, i pretty much looked friggin amazing. and we had such a good time dancing there. it was funny because it was me, matt, my bestfriend whitney hunt, and her date tyler, and we were dancing and having so much fun we didn't notice we were the last ones on the dance floor, until the lights came on. haha. talk about living in the moment. aye.
now its back to reality, and school. im actually ready for break...





"I was hysterical. That was the trouble. I was jealous of anyone she had anything to do with. I demanded absolute trust from her, because I wasn't trustworthy myself. I was neurotic, taking all my frustrations out on her. She did leave me once. That was terrible. I couldn't stand being without her." - John Lennon

"It was at this point in our marriage that I realized that unless I joined the club, we weren't going to survive, so I succumbed to one of John's never ending requests to take LSD with him. I didn't want to but I felt that I had to save our marriage. I also believe John in his own way was doing the same. During my trip John was marvelous. But whatever happiness and awareness John gained through it, I didn't. I hated every moment. It was hell on earth. The hallucinations sent me into a panic. Through my tears and fears I would look at John in the hope that he could in some way help me out of the prison my mind had become., only to see the man I loved turn into a giant mule with razor sharp teeth leering and laughing at me. All the time John kept telling me he loved me and would never leave me. All I could reason was that I was definitely going mad. It was something I never wanted to experience again." - Cynthia Lennon

a picture i took at a Lennon Yoko bed in exhibit.